


The Way I Feel

by TheFandomLesbian



Series: Spencer's Raulson One-Shots [46]
Category: American Horror Story, American Horror Story: Apocalypse, American Horror Story: Coven
Genre: F/F, foxxay - Freeform, goodeday, not season eight compliant, pre-Seven Wonders, raulson - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-13
Updated: 2020-03-13
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:53:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23131270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFandomLesbian/pseuds/TheFandomLesbian
Summary: When left alone at the academy, Cordelia cooks Misty a meal. Misty struggles to tell her about her vegetarianism over a plate of cooked ground beef.
Relationships: Misty Day/Cordelia Foxx | Cordelia Goode
Series: Spencer's Raulson One-Shots [46]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1214643
Comments: 10
Kudos: 55





	The Way I Feel

**Author's Note:**

> For a Foxxay dialogue prompt: "You haven't even touched your food. What's going on?"

“I'd do anything for you

But it's too late and I know I'm making

A fool, a fool of myself

But I can't conceal the way that I feel.” -Fleetwood Mac, “The Way I Feel” 

...

Misty lifted her head as she crossed the yard from the greenhouse to the academy. She climbed the steps and slipped out of her shoes, leaving them on the porch so she wouldn’t track anything gross into the house. Miss Robichaux’s was by far the nicest building Misty had ever occupied, and the last thing she wanted to do was tarnish it. She had dirt up to her wrists and streaks all over her clothes.  _ I gotta shower.  _ Before, it never would’ve bothered her, but she had Cordelia to impress now--especially since Myrtle had given her new eyes.  _ I really liked her the way she was… But I might like her even more, now.  _ A blush ran up Misty’s neck. She couldn’t let herself think too much about it; otherwise, Cordelia would See her thoughts. 

Drumming her way up the stairs, Misty noted the silence of the house, the absence of other people.  _ Is anybody else even home?  _ she wondered. But she shrugged off the notion. She was used to being alone, even if the house frightened her more than any night in the woods ever had. She gathered up a towel and headed to the bathroom, locking the door behind her, and then she stripped herself of her dirty clothes, dropping them in the hamper and cranking on the hot water of the shower. 

She had missed the showers of civilization during her days in the swamp. Everything else about society, she could live without--even electricity was optional for somebody who knew how to grow and wash vegetables and start a fire. But the goat soap she stole from the old lady a few miles up the road from her house just couldn’t touch the chemical smelly-good stuff the girls here liked to use, and the swamp water would never be as clean as the steaming hot flow from the shower tap. Stepping under the scalding stream, Misty shivered, relishing in the feeling of it reddening her skin. She liked to feel herself swell under the water. If it didn’t hurt, it wasn’t hot enough. 

She hadn’t felt that way before. But now, she could never truly shake the stench of the smoke and her own rotting, toasted flesh from her body, no matter how fresh her new skin. The odor haunted her and reared up when she least expected it. She tried to smother it with Madison’s perfumes and colognes and Zoe’s lotions, but it sprung back up, nothing wholly eliminating it. 

Scrubbing herself with a washcloth and vigorously scrubbing her scalp, Misty picked through her curls under the running water and washed the dirt from her leg hair where it had gotten caught and matted. It only took a few minutes for her to feel clean, the fruity and flowery scents of women’s soap surrounding her, and she stepped out, patting herself dry with a towel. She dug around under the cabinet.  _ They’re gonna find out I’m stealing their stuff, eventually.  _ She would handle that when they caught her. Pulling out a tube of Bath and Body Works, she opened the cap and smelled it. “Oh, yummy.” She didn’t even bother to read the bottle as she squeezed out a copious amount of it into her hands and began to rub it all over herself, anywhere she had patted dry, and let the lotion butter up her skin. As she absorbed the scents, she tilted her head back. Oh, she savored this feeling. 

Looking around, Misty surveyed the steamy room for her clean clothes, only to find they weren’t there.  _ I must’ve forgot them. _ She wrapped her towel around herself and opened the door, stepping out into the hall, face-to-face with Cordelia. “Eep.” She peeped the quiet sound as she blinked at the older woman.  _ Oh, boy. I’m naked.  _ Her throat closed up.  _ I’m naked in front of Cordelia.  _ Trying to push her crush down inside her, she gulped. “Er--Miss Cordelia. Sorry, I just forgot my clothes… I didn’t think anybody was home.”

Cordelia’s eyes widened. “Oh--it’s just us. Don’t ask me where everybody else is, though. Nobody tells me anything. I was looking for you. I cooked dinner.” She smiled. Her odd eyes, the one blue and one brown, darted up and down Misty’s exposed body.  _ I’m pretending I didn’t notice her just check me out.  _ Misty flushed, clutching her towel tighter around herself so her knuckles blanched white. She couldn’t judge; after all, Cordelia had been blind when they met, and she had only seen Misty with her eyes a handful of times. “I suppose I should let you go get dressed.” 

Misty grinned. “Yeah, I might appreciate that.” 

Stepping out of the way, Cordelia let her pass. “You smell good.”

Misty beamed. “Thanks!” Her heart fluttered. She fumbled around with her bedroom door, sliding in and closing it behind her before she gave a gleeful, relieved sigh. 

In a few minutes, she clad herself in some fresh clothes--clothes which were probably altogether too dressy for her to be wearing around the house. She hadn’t been able to salvage much from her old life, mostly things she could steal and barter for at the Cajun markets where she trusted no one would recognize her. This left her choice of outfits somewhat barren. She wiggled her body into a dress she had borrowed from Madison, complete with tall boots, and she carefully picked through her hair so it looked neatly careless. 

Cordelia was at the end of the hall, staring down the staircase, a forlorn look on her face. Misty approached her from behind.  _ She’s so pretty _ . Her caramel-colored hair matched the wood floors, and her white blouse let just a hint of her bra underneath appear through the sheer fabric. Her jeans were skin-tight. Cordelia hung her head. Misty frowned, touching a hand to the small of Cordelia’s back. Cordelia flinched away in surprise, a hand fluttering over her chest, as her eyes widened in fear. For a moment, Misty didn’t see herself reflected in Cordelia’s odd eyes, but someone else. “Oh--” Her voice was breathless. “Misty. You startled me.”

“Sorry, I wasn’t trying to sneak up on you. Are you alright? You’re looking a little downtrodden.” 

Nodding, Cordelia waved off her feelings. “I’m fine,” she assuaged. Misty wasn’t sure she believed her, but she gave a slight smile. “C’mon. I cooked.” As she headed down the stairs, Misty followed, and the first thing that met Misty’s nose was the smell of… cooked meat.  _ Oh god. _ Misty chewed the inside of her cheek. Cordelia hadn’t  _ told her _ she was planning on cooking. If she had, Misty would’ve given her a heads up.  _ Maybe there’ll be a vegetable on the side. Something I can eat.  _

There wasn’t. As Misty entered the kitchen, a large, beautiful lasagna awaited her.  _ Can I, like, scrape the meat out of it?  _ “This is beautiful, Miss Cordelia,” she complimented.  _ No. Too many layers. She’d get suspicious.  _ She didn’t want Cordelia to think she was ungrateful. Misty was from a place where she ate what was put in front of her or she didn’t get to eat, and while she doubted Cordelia would institute such strict rules, she feared a refusal to eat what was cooked would hurt her feelings. 

“Thank you.” 

Resigning herself to her fate, Misty cut the smallest piece of lasagna she could manage.  _ I’m just going to have to be an adult and eat it.  _ Was it dishonest for her to eat it without telling Cordelia? What if this started a trend? What if she and Cordelia fell in love and Misty started eating meat because she was afraid to tell her and ten years from now they were married and she finally confessed that she used to be a vegetarian and it destroyed Cordelia’s trust in her and they got a divorce?  _ Okay, that’s taking it a little far.  _ Licking her lips, Misty got a bottle of water and sat down at the table across from Cordelia, staring down at the lasagna. 

Cordelia sat, as well. “So…” Misty looked up at her. “How are you liking things here?” 

Misty hurried to cut the lasagna into pieces with her fork, hoping it would make it look like less.  _ I haven’t even tasted it yet. It may be fine. Maybe I can just eat it and then tell her that I don’t eat meat afterward, for future reference.  _ “I, um… Well, it’s a lot better than getting shot at in the swamp in the middle of the night and running around in the slime wearing a nighty.”

Giving a soft chuckle, Cordelia shook her head. “You’re funny.” Her eyes kept darting back up to Misty, like she didn’t want to look away, and Misty felt her face warming at the notion of Cordelia staring at  _ her. _ “I--I’m glad you’re here. I like having some company in the greenhouse.”  _ Nobody was using it when I got here. _ “And now, for dinner.” 

“It’s better than boiling vegetables with swamp water over an open flame.”  _ At least I can eat those vegetables.  _ Misty would not complain. She was hungry, but she could always sneak back downstairs later and eat some buttered toast or some tomatoes. “I really like being with you, Miss Cordelia.” 

Cordelia tilted her head. “But?” 

Blinking, Misty shrugged. “But?” she asked. “That’s it. It was a complete sentence.”

Cordelia looked just as astonished as Misty felt. “Usually when someone says something nice about me, they follow it up with a  _ but _ .” 

“Well, I’m not,” she reassured. Cordelia had an odd look on her face, heartfelt, tender. “I don’t know if I fit in well with everybody else.” She blinked down at her lasagna. She couldn’t take a bite while Cordelia was looking at her, just in case it made her gag. The smell of cooked meat alone made her stomach turn. “But I love being with you.” 

“Thank you, Misty. That’s very sweet of you to say.” Cordelia hesitated, looking down at her own food. “I enjoy your company a lot, as well.”  _ Now, while she’s not looking! _ Misty took a small nibble of the lasagna.  _ Oh, shit, spit it out discreetly, hurry! _ Cordelia looked back up at her, and Misty forced herself to swallow with a dry gulp, praying she didn’t turn as green as she felt on the inside. “Are you alright? You haven’t even touched your food. What’s going on?” 

Misty made a quiet, “Ahem,” wondering if she should tell the truth or try to lie on the spot. “I, um… I’m a vegetarian,” she confessed. She wasn’t a very good liar. Cordelia’s eyes widened with shock as Misty spoke the soft words, and desperate to keep from offending her, Misty decided to ramble instead. “My mama made me help cook the Thanksgiving turkey when I was twelve, and when I stuck my arm up its butt, it came to life and it chased me and Mama all over the house, and now whenever I eat meat, it makes me afraid it’s gonna come back to life, which I know is crazy if it’s already been chopped up and cooked, but I still have nightmares about turkey guts splattering all over the house, but I didn’t want to say anything because I really like you and what if it offended you and then we wouldn’t be married in ten years, but then I thought what if we are married in ten years and you  _ still don’t know _ that I’m a vegetarian and I’ve spent ten years going behind your back trying to eat raw broccoli when I’m alone and I’m basically cheating on you with kale, which is a sin all of its own?” 

One could’ve heard a pin drop in the silence that followed. Misty closed her eyes tightly. “I’m just realizing I probably should’ve stopped talking after I told the Thanksgiving story.” 

Cordelia laughed. Misty dared to open one eye at her, and she, too, had turned as red as the marinara sauce on the lasagna. She covered her mouth as she laughed, but the crinkles around her eyes were mirthful and filled with delight. Misty was afraid to move. “Misty--I made this meal so I could talk to you about going somewhere with me tomorrow. But, for the record… I don’t think you can cheat on me with kale.” She giggled.

“Somewhere like where?” Misty didn’t quite understand. 

“Somewhere like anywhere?”

“Oh, somewhere like a date. Well, shoot, yeah, as long as there aren’t any turkey carcasses!”  _ How did this work out in my favor?  _

Cordelia took the bowl of lasagna away from her. “There’s a vegan restaurant a few blocks off from Bourbon Street,” she offered, “if you’d like to go.” Misty nodded vigorously. “And we could go shopping afterward.”

“You want to go shopping with me?” 

“You’re wearing Madison’s  _ look at my legs _ dress.”

As she stood, Misty looked down at it. It did, indeed, leave very little to the imagination. “Well, I reckon I am. I didn’t know it had a name.” She left the kitchen table and took the plate from Cordelia. “Let me. It’s my mess.” As she passed, Cordelia’s hand brushed down the small of her back and then just a little lower, sending lovely tingles over her entire body.  _ Yep, it’s my mess.  _


End file.
